Monday, October 25, 2010

8 Unexpected Benefits of Breastfeeding

Though it is the biologically normal way to feed a baby not every one is sure about breastfeeding.  The beauty of breastfeeding is often touted to encourage moms to give it a try because if they knew how amazing it is even the most unsure would at least think about breastfeeding.  Everything from health benefits to ease of use, breastfeeding is praised for the dream infant nutrition system it is.  These are good things and we should promote them but over the years I've discovered a few, shall we say unexpected benefits of breastfeeding?  Sure, it's great that breastmilk can do things like reduce a woman's chance of breast cancer, boost a little baby's immune system, and even have stem cells in it but I bet you didn't know breastfeeding can be an orgasm alert!  Oh yeah, there are some seriously good unexpected benefits from something so normal as breastfeeding.  I'm going to do my part in encouraging women to give breastfeeding a go with 8 Unexpected Benefits of Breastfeeding.

1.  The best excuse to sit around
Don't feel like making dinner? Gotta feed the baby!  For the last 10 months I've made breakfast maybe a dozen times all because Smunchie needs her breakfast too and the next thing I know The Piano Man has coffee and either eggs and toast (or a frittata, yum) or pancakes going.  Oh darn, sorry sweetie, I was planning on getting that started just as soon as I could.  I was stuck on the couch feeding a poor, helpless little baby!

2.  Escape plan A 
Trapped in a conversation with someone you want to get away from?  Oh dear, baby's hungry!  I don't believe women need to worry about being discreet about breastfeeding in public but if one suddenly feels modest and needs to go sit some place quiet to nurse nobody will blame you and you can get away from the uncomfortable conversation with Whatshername Won'tstoptalking.

3.  The kitchen fall back plan
Making pancakes but ran out of milk?  No worries!  And if you don't tell anybody they may all wonder what you did different that made your flapjacks so much more yummy.  Don't tell them until after they're done though, seems even children that grew on your milk before can become squeamish at the idea years later.  And hubs won't know if it's the creamer in his coffee either.

4.  Bigger B@@bs!
It's true a woman's breasts usually increases in size during pregnancy and remains that way or bigger while lactating.  You may not have ever cared if you got bigger boobs but it is still interesting to see them change, never a dull moment!

5.  BUSTin' at the seams = SHOPPING!  
Legit reason to go shopping, nothing fits right!  Those bigger boobies need to be comfortable and showcased properly, get the attire to do it in style.  Time to hit the racks or the online boutiques and buy yourself some stylish wear to dress the ladies in and it's totally real, you actually do NEED new clothes you can nurse in!

6.  Weapons of mass destruction 
Make me mad?  Yeah, I wouldn't do that, I could whip one of these full C-cup babies out and with a little squeeze blow you to smithereens.  Or at least get you wet and sticky.  Don't put it past me either, you never know what will set me off.

7.   Double Alarm- well, hello Big O. 
Your partner not sure when you've have an orgasm?  You'll boost his confidence when you come with a double set of sprinklers spraying all over the place.  Many women experience milk spray from their lactating breasts when the orgasm.  Don't let it rain on your parade, enjoy the new twist on doing the deed!

8.  Cure-all in a cute package 
Baby got a blocked tear duct?  Squirt a little breastmilk in her eye.  Diaper rash?  A breastmilk rinse and then some naked time will clear that up in no time if it's not a yeast based rash.  Cut?  Ready, aim, squirt!  You guessed it, a little spray of breastmilk on the area and watch it heal in record time.  From acne to ear infections, breastmilk has amazing healing properties!  People, it has stem cells in it, breastmilk is the stuff modern medicine wants to be when it grows up!  And for more amazing health science on breastmilk try googling HAMLET (all caps) and breastmilk.  Prepared to be wow'd.

9.  Facebook/Twitter/Blog/Surfing time
I admit it, most of the time when I'm on some social media networking site I probably have a baby attached and if I'm lucky and she's really hungry I can stretch it long enough to get caught up on all the people I follow or even write a blog post.  It's called NAK (Nursing At the Keyboard) but it could also be called NeTCFToN (Need To Check Facebook Time to Nurse) because how else would I find the time?  A Leaky's got to do what a Leaky's got to do.  (Are you a Leaky?  Go like our Facebook page and join the fun!)

Oh rats, that was 9.  Now it sounds like I just couldn't come up with one more for a nice round 10.  Oh well.

Not only have my boobies given me healthy babies they've also healed rashes, bought me time to sit, and given me an excuse to shop for new clothes.  There is a lot of wonderful stuff about breastfeeding and I'm a fan but even I don't love every second of every breastfeeding session.  I tell you what though, I sure do love The Piano Man making me breakfast while I get my Tweet on.


  1. LMAO @ "Whatshername Won'tstoptalking"

  2. love love love these and yes I have used them all. I always say I nurse because I am lazy. I am a lazy environmentalist and AP mom! Its all about convenience, you never forget a boob! and yes I have used my boobs as milk guns!

  3. I love it! Theses are so true :-)

  4. I'm TOTALLY looking forward to #2 since my in-laws seem to be obnoxiously opinionated. And I'm sure they're going to have nasty and inappropriate comments about bf itself. So it will be nice to have to "excuse myself" during family functions - whether baby has to bf or not!

  5. So true! Im always cutting out of conversations with my Cat Lady neighbor by telling her I have to go feed Julian. Theres also a benefit for husbands..or atleast mine, which usually occurs on Sunday when hes glued to the TV watching football. Anytime Julian starts fussing hes like here, I think hes hungry haha. Knowing im the only one who can feed him!

  6. LOL I have used all nine :) Love sitting on the couch feeding the baby and hubs cooks LOL :) I also get to sit here and read amazing blogs, play on my farmville farm and just generally play on the computer while my little guy nurses himself to sleep.. of course if I get up he wakes up so I need to stay here and let him get his nap LOL :) YAY!!

  7. Where can I find the "milk on tap" shirt??! Awesomeness!

  8. The shirt is from PaperMama, you can click the PaperMama graphic on the right to get to her shop and order one for yourself. You can't see it but Smunchie's shirt says "I get mine straight from the tap" and is also from PaperMama.

  9. 10. Getting fun and humorous advice from an amazing group of online leakies.

    Thanks, TLB!!

  10. 10. It's an eye make up remover, facial cleanser and anti ageing product all in one

    11. It gets rid of warts and helps stop chicken pox itching.

    12. They say there's no cure for the common cold. Wrong! Can be put in nose and ears as well as swallowed. And its the best sore throat remedy I've ever tried, bar none.

    There ya go, a nice round dozen!

  11. seriously, you can squeeze out enough to make pancakes?
    ANd never had sprinklers either...
    And yes, I agree that your friends might get TMI... But what the heck

  12. I have so much supply, I hand expressed easily 2oz in less than 5 minutes the other day. It's kind of crazy. This why I'm a donor, so much milk.

  13. There are post-breast feeding b@@bs and then there are pre-breastfeeding little girl handfuls. The changes are permanent and, speaking as a male, viva la difference! I'm a huge fan of breastfeeding, our three kids benefitted from it and, now that they are approaching their teens, we are left to enjoy the ongoing rewards. Add permanent natural enlargement as your missing number 10.


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